Toxic Tuesday: We are aware that seminary doesn’t teach how to handle abuse allegations or how to minister to victims. So why is it that most churches follow the same protocol when it comes to mishandling abuse allegations or denying involvement in cover-ups? #RememberTheMillstone
Category Archives: Toxic Tuesday
Emotional abuse checklist
30 question checklist of less talked about signs of emotional abuse. Many churches teach that men are over women in every aspect of life which leads to abusive, angry and controlling men taking toxic liberties with power. Is this you or someone you know?
The 2 sides of abusive men
Number of people per minute who experience intimate partner violence in the U.S.: 24 Number of workplace violence incidents in the U.S. annually that are the result of current or past intimate partner assaults: 18,700 Number of women in the U.S. who report intimate partner violence: 1 in 4 Number of women who are killedContinue reading “The 2 sides of abusive men”
Toxic Tuesday: Emotional Roller Coaster
FYI: I’ve shortened the articles for quick readability. 2-3 minutes!
Toxic Tuesday: Traumatic bonding
Abuse comes in many forms and knows no boundaries. 1 in 4 women will experience domestic abuse during her lifetime and more than 3 million children witness domestic violence in their homes every year. *Men can also be the victim of abuse, but my ministry is mainly to women so I address myContinue reading “Toxic Tuesday: Traumatic bonding”
Andy Savage Sexual Abuse Resignation: A necessary decision
In case you missed earlier headlines about Andy Savage here is a recap. Andy Savage was the teaching pastor at Highpoint Church in Memphis, TN. A student from his youth group twenty years ago came forward and publicly named him as having sexually assaulted her years ago. The assault took place when she attended theContinue reading “Andy Savage Sexual Abuse Resignation: A necessary decision”
Change statute of limitations for sex crimes against children/use prior assault evidence
TOXIC POLICY This is in response to the Olympic gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar, who was convicted in court last month for molesting patients for years. Thank you to the victims of these terrible crimes for using your trauma and pain for a great purpose that will serve future abuse victims. Thank you, Rachael Denhollander, forContinue reading “Change statute of limitations for sex crimes against children/use prior assault evidence”
In the wake of infidelity (Helping the victim)
What a woman needs most from her friends in the middle of her shocking news…that her husband is being unfaithful is for a friend to listen. Affirm her, acknowledge her pain, pray for her…and other practical helps.
Domestic Abuse: 5 Biblical principles & 5 guidelines
Many Christian counselors, pastors, and lay leaders are still woefully ill-equipped to handle this issue. Leslie Vernick is changing this!
Toxic Tuesday: Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing
Even the most well trained counselor can have a difficult time discerning between the two; after all, wolves are experts at deceit. Here are 3 ways to spot a wolf. Disclaimer: Usually only family members know the truth.
Toxic Tuesday: The Great Porn Experiment
Porn alters the brain, but
if/when you stop using porn the brain can heal over time.
6 Things Personality Disordered People Do
Here is why you don’t simply forgive, forget, and continue in the relationship.
Toxic Tuesday: Lysa TerKeurst’s Betrayal
The few times I’ve listened to Lysa in Bible studies or on pod casts over the last year I wondered if this was the difficult circumstance which she was living in of which she couldn’t speak.
Toxic Tuesday: Manifesto of the Duplicitous
This still makes my skin crawl. In light of innocent victims number 32 is off the charts unhealthy and twisted when considered in the context of predator and victim.
20 Signs You Were Raised by a Narcissist
I’ve talked with many adults who testify to being raised by a parent, or both parents, who have narcissistic personality disorder. See if you can relate…or at least provide validation for a friend who has suffered this type of abuse.
Personality Disorders in Prominent Positions
Narcissists have no boundaries with other people’s feelings, ideas, and needs. When dealing with this personality there are phrases that you need to memorize and keep in your mental pocket.
Toxic Tuesday: Unsafe Relationships
If you answered yes to one or more of these questions the below video may be the best invested 22 minutes of your week.
Toxic Tuesday: #1 Sign of Emotional Abuse
I’m again passing on lessons I’ve learned the hard way. There is one glaring clue for spotting an unsafe person; an abuser…so, please, let me enlighten you…
Recognize and Prevent Emotional Abuse
Church: Recognize and prevent emotional abuse and be prepared to help the abused woman. Letter from a pastor… professional help now…references for local counselors
Toxic Tuesday: Do You Have Biblical Permission to Leave a Toxic Spouse?
Today I’m sharing the blog post that has daily, for 3 1/2 years, remained the most read article I’ve written.
MOSAIC: Threat Assessment for Abused Women
MOSAIC helps the assessor weigh the present situation in light of expert opinion and research, and instantly compare the present situation to past cases where the outcomes are known.
Narcissistic Slanderer
Paul wrote the following New Testament verses to Timothy; concerning the character and behavior of leaders within the church, not in the world. He warned Timothy to beware that some will act out of a self-love attitude. Paul says, “You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. ForContinue reading “Narcissistic Slanderer”
Toxic Tuesday: Narcissistic Personality Disorder?
In older posts I have mentioned narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder. I’ve also written about the possibility of an individual having more than one personality disorder. Today I will discuss a narcissistic sociopath. “Narcissism is a term commonly used to describe those who seem more concerned with themselves than with others. It is important to distinguish betweenContinue reading “Toxic Tuesday: Narcissistic Personality Disorder?”
20 Clues You’re With a Narcissist.
Want to know what it feels like to live with a narcissist? Here is a quick read…
Millenials and “Cool” Christianity
If being of the world is more attractive than not being in it, then by all means live for yourself. But, do not come around for the trendy Christian worship music and the man buns and the coffee. Hipster Christianity shouldn’t be a trend. 1 Thessalonians 4:7-8 is very clear about this.
Naghmeh Abedini: How Do We Respond? Part 3
There is scriptural precedence for blame not being split down the middle. This is a point we all need to understand when it comes to marital problems.
Guest Post: The Secret Language of Narcissists: How Abusers Manipulate Their Victims
Validation. Isn’t that what so many women who suffer from narcissistic abuse long for in their live? Yes! Here is another article that will remind you: 1) You’re not crazy. 2) You can take back the control and power from your abuser.
Naghmeh Abedini: How Do We Respond? Part 2
You never know what goes on in someone else’s home. You have no way of understanding if the woman sitting next to you in Bible study, or worshiping next to you in church is secretly being mistreated in her home. If she should muster up the courage to tell you; please listen. Please believe her.
Naghmeh Abedini: How Do We Respond?
I’ve updated my blog with a new look—check it out! While you’re there read my latest post, part 1, random thoughts on the Abedini’s marriage where I will share my thoughts on spousal abuse in the Christian home.
Why Men Don’t Change
Source: Why Men Don’t Change I’ve been a reader of Gary Thomas’s books for several years and I’m always thankful for his spiritual insight and practical applications. This article will be helpful to many of my readers who are in difficult marriages, or know a friend or loved one in a difficult marriage. The difficultyContinue reading “Why Men Don’t Change”