Help for Living in a Toxic Relationship

Toxic Tuesday biochem hazard

A few days ago I blogged about the power of the cross for overcoming lies.

This week I return to the cross applying it to a hurt heart, soul, mind and strength.

Are you broken-hearted from living in a toxic relationship while believing no one can possibly fathom what goes on in your daily life; let alone, help you?

There is someone who knows the truth, who understands, who feels your broken heart, who wants to help and best of all; this person can help. I know because He has helped me on multiple occasions.

“He was despised and rejected and forsaken by men, a Man of sorrows and pains, and acquainted with grief and sickness;” Isaiah 53:3 (AMP) 

He has been in our shoes.

“Surely he took up our pain
    and bore our suffering,
yet we considered him punished by God,
    stricken by him, and afflicted.
But he was pierced for our transgressions,
    he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was on him,
    and by his wounds we are healed.” Isaiah 53:4-5

Jesus experienced all our sin, hurt, and heartache while upon the cross. He experienced the hurt and heartache that happened to us at the hands or words of another person sinning against us because Jesus died for their sin too. He bore their sin against you just as He bore our sin against Him and against others.

Jesus experienced the depth of rejection by the religious leaders and community, His brothers did not believe Him (John 7:5), several apostles and close friends were embarrassed or fearful and abandoned Him,  one of His closest companions betrayed him. Add to all this slander, lies and attempted CRAZYMAKING from every direction. He was mocked, arrested, beaten, tortured and then He willingly laid down His life in the worst possible death; crucifixion on the cross. He suffered crucifixion death for every person who ever had lived, was living and would live; including the people who partook in His arrest, trial and death.

Because of the cross Jesus understands. Those who have accepted Jesus, by faith, as their Lord and Savior can receive healing, power, wisdom, and provisions for journey.

The best way I find these provisions is through a daily love relationship with Father God. I have a pattern of trying to make this relationship better by trying to love Him more; forgetting that although He wants me to love Him, it is based on His love for me. I tend to think the same way about the cross in my belief that Jesus died for me so I wouldn’t miss out on Father God in heaven because Jesus knows exactly what we are missing out on by not being in heaven. Although this is true, Jesus died for us because He loves us and knows how loved we are by our heavenly Father. I just cannot wrap my mind around how great His love, their love, for me is—how great their love for you is.

I cannot adequately explain this or explain God. There is always more to tell you.

All I know is it happens one day at a time. Day after day. Struggle after struggle. Victory after victory. At the beginning or the end of a day when it seems like there isn’t strength or sanity left in heart, soul, mind and strength to carry on; there is.

Here is a quote I have had printed, framed and sitting on my dresser for the last sixteen years:


For those of you in a toxic relationship; you may need to draw upon God’s boundless store of grace from hour to hour as you need it. There is always hope; no one can take that from you. And there is always God; no one can keep you from Him—except you.

Published by Carolyn Deevers's my spiritual superpower for surviving crises and complicated relationships. Here is where I share stories...or at least the ones I can tell you about. ;-)

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